Category: The Saga

Plan B

You know what, mates? Scratch whatever I said earlier.

According to our scouts, Bellij has a new general leading his troops. His best one, or so I hear. "The Crimson Knight", they call him.

Sounds like bullshit to me. I see what Bellij is trying to do here. He knows that I can’t resist a fight. He knows that I’ll be drawn to the front lines by news of this Crimson Knight.

And that’s exactly what I’m gonna do.

I know what you’re thinking: "Kak, this sounds like a trap!"

Of course it does, you stupid tart. And I’m going to walk right into it. Bellij is forgetting one thing. I’m not afraid of his traps. What’s the worst he could do to me? Surround me with thirty of his lame-ass soldiers? Please.

I could ruin his day by not showing up right away, but I’ll make him feel even worse if I act exactly the way he’s expecting me to, and he still fails to capture me. That’ll completely demoralize him, and the war will be over before it’s even begun.

More Gifts

I received a some new equipment yesterday. A shiny new sword, an unblemished shield, and most importantly, some new armour. Heavy stuff, that armour is. Nothing like the tattered chainmail I had before. This is head to toe plate mail. My skin is completely covered by this new set. Odd, since Bellij wants me dead. Also odd is Bellij’s choice in colour for this armour. Up until now I have been forced to wear the mustard yellow and black colours of his army, but this new armour is crimson. Not exactly the red and black that I am used to, but eerily similar. I was confused by his gestures until later that day.
We were spotted by some Union scouts yesterday as well. In my new armour, there is no way that they could have recognized me. I believe that Bellij intended for this to happen, as he made no attempt to capture the scouts. Clearly he does not want to reveal my identity just yet. That would be his first reason for giving me the armour. I also believe that he is trying to build me up to be more than I am. If he wanted to mask my identity, he could have just given me a helmet or put me in the back for a while, but instead he gave me all sorts of unnecessary add-ons. My guess is that he is trying to intimidate Kakunaman into waiting a while before entering the battle. It is a crafty move on Bellij’s part, but he seems to be underestimating Kakunaman’s resolve.
In other news, today marks four years since the founding of the Union. I wonder if the God of Beer ever envisioned one of his successors leading an attack on the great Union which he gave his life to create.

War? Pah.

Bellij never gives up, does he?
Mates, he’s back again and he’s only a few days away from our outermost defenses. If he thinks he can beat us this time, he’s mental. We’re short a tactician this time, but it shouldn’t matter much. His troops are poorly trained and most of them have no clue who I am. He might have us outmanned, but one of our soldiers is about equal to twenty of his in terms of skill level. He won’t stand a chance.
As for myself, I’m going to wait for our troops to punch a bit of a hole in Bellij’s lines before I join the fray myself. Bellij doesn’t have a clue where I am, after all. There’s no need to ruin the surprise right away. I’m going to let him attack first and lure him into a false sense of security. Just when he thinks that I’m somewhere far, far away, that’s when I’ll show up right in front of the bastard. He may not have done it directly, but the fucker killed s3c0ndh4nd, and if he thinks that I’ve forgotten about that already, he’s got another thing coming.

One More Year

That’s all the time I have left, and there’s a simple reason for that: I’m not getting old.

I absolutely, completely, and steadfastly refuse to get old. It’s just not an option for me. So, next year at around this time, I’ll leave and none of you will ever see me alive again.

The question you might be asking is: "What’s wrong with getting old?"

Nothing, for most people. But it’s my worst nightmare.

I’m different than most people, I guess you could say. I haven’t been here very long, but I think you’ve all had a chance to get to know me fairly well, so you know that I love kids. Love. I think that kids are the greatest people alive, and honestly I would much rather spend an afternoon with a twelve year old than with someone my age or older. And, whenever possible, I do that.

But there will come a point when I won’t be able to anymore. Most kids have the "Don’t talk to strangers" rule engraved into their minds. You’ll notice, though, that this rule doesn’t apply to other kids. If a ten year old approaches another ten year old and starts talking to him or her, you’ll never hear one of the kids say "Sorry, I’m not supposed to talk to strangers." It just doesn’t happen that way.

Up to now, I’ve been pretty safe. I don’t look very threatening, and so kids let their guard down around me. They trust me, and I’d die before I’d betray that trust. I love them, like I said, and they respect me.

Eventually I’m going to hit that point where I’ll cease to be someone to respect and start to be someone to fear. Can you imagine how hard that would be for me to accept? Having the people I love fear me? I won’t stand for it.

The other thing is that adults are expected to behave in an adult fashion. Adults aren’t supposed to interact with kids in the way that I want to. I’d be quickly labeled as a pedophile. And in the end, that’s what I am, I guess. Not in the modern, child-molester usage of the word. I’ll go on the record as saying that I believe that sexual abuse of children should be punishable by death, and that’s not an exaggeration. Besides killing a child (which I believe should be punished by torture, followed by a slow, painful death), I believe it is the most foul crime on earth. But I digress. I am a pedophile in the classic Greek sense of the word Paidophilia. Pais (meaning child), and philia (meaning love or friendship). That’s me in essence: A lover of children. I don’t want to molest them, or hurt them in any way. I just want to befriend them. Protect them. Laugh with them. Share their good times and their bad. Hold them close, let them know that I’m there for them. That’s all I want.

And because of my way of thinking, other adults will shun me and cast me aside. I can live with that.

What I can’t live with is the fact that my beloved ones will soon fear me, and will reject me. I refuse to live in such a world.

One year is all I have left to enjoy.


The Lamb

Something of note happened today that made me realize just how desperate Bellij is for his plan to work.
We found a single man who had (as he explained it) become separated from his scouting party. The light armour he wore identified him as one of the Union’s scouts. I ordered Bellij’s troops to surround him, and surprisingly enough they obeyed. Bellij, wondering why the army had stopped moving, walked up to the front lines and demanded answers. I explained to him that this fellow was a Union scout, and Bellij told me that I should give an order for his execution.
For a moment, I was horrified. Posing as the enemy was one thing, but ordering the execution of one of my allies? I would not do it, I decided in my mind. 
And then I realized that the man was not a Union scout at all.
The armour he wore was indeed the same type worn by Union scouts, and he carried the same reconnaissance equipment that a Union scout would carry, and yet… he was a fraud.
Had he truly been a Union scout, Bellij would have been terrified. If a Union scout was here, it meant that a Union scouting party was nearby, and if that was the case then they might have already seen me and be heading back to alert Kakunaman of my presence, thus ruining Bellij’s entire plan.
But Bellij was calm about the whole issue. This was another test of my loyalty, I realized. Bellij had dressed one of his own men in the armour of a previously captured Union scout in order to gauge just how far I was willing to go to avoid being executed. I would not play into his hand. I ordered the man to be hung from the nearest tree. Of course I felt terrible for doing so, but there was no way around it. Bellij grunted his approval and returned to the back as the army marched on.
He sacrifices his own men for such trivial things? It is no wonder his army has such low morale. They probably destest him as much as me.


Our departure has been delayed for at least a day, if not longer, by inclement weather. It is utterly futile to attempt to advance such a large army through mud.
Bellij calls it bad luck. I call it foreshadowing.

Go Time

The order is given. We are to begin our long march towards the temple in three days.
Never before have I payed so little attention to the strategic elements of this battle. Winning is not something that I will be trying very hard to do. Survival is my goal.
You see, I know Bellij’s plan. He does not intend for me to lead his troops to victory. He intends for me to lead his troops in battle up until a certain point. Then, he will give some sort of signal, and his men will turn their blades upon me. With both armies looking to kill me, my odds of survival are low. Beliij would then put my corpse on full display, destroying the morale of the Union’s troops, and giving his own the momentum they need for a victory.
Bellij has made one major oversight, however. He seems to have forgotten about Kakunaman. No… not forgotten. Bellij is not that dense. But he seems to be underestimating him. Bellij doesn’t know Kakunaman like I do. In all likelihood, he will be leading the Union’s defenses. Even if he is not, the moment he hears that I am leading Bellij’s forces, he will rush out to meet me. Once him and I meet face to face, Bellij is done for.
Bellij would not dare to strike me down in view of Kakunaman. If he did, Kakunaman would become blood drunk, and Bellij would lose much of his main army in the first battle of the war, essentially costing him the war. Bellij could retreat after killing me, but then Kakunaman would surely persue him, the results of which would be similar to the first scenario. Kakunaman would not rest until Bellij himself lay dead at his feet.
As such, Bellij would have to kill me before Kakunaman arrives at the front lines. He could use my corpse to give his troops a great deal of momentum. They would slaughter our outermost lines of defense. The casualties would be enormous. Then, he would have to dispose of my body before Kakunaman sees it. Kakunaman does not know that I still live, and as such, he will not be alarmed if I fail to show my face at the battle.
That then, is Bellij’s plan. It must be, for it is his only chance at success. I need to survive for one hour. That will be enough time for Kakunaman to receive the news of my presence, and for him to arrive at the front lines, prepared to fight.
One hour is all I need. I know the temple’s defenses like the back of my hand. With a little bit of luck, victory is assured.


In front of me I see a sword, but it is not my sword. Yes, it is real. I can reach out and touch it. I can pick it up and feel the force of its weight on my body. It is not my sword; it is far too heavy, and the grip is entirely different. It is capable of killing a man, just like my sword, but there is no mercy in this sword. My sword can choose whether or not to spare a man’s life. This sword is wild and violent. Untamable. It has a life of its own, and with its life it seeks to end as many other lives as possible, guilty or not. It is not my sword.
In front of me I see armour, but it is not my armour. It is comprised of the same pieces as my armour. There is a helmet, chain mail, and plated legs, but these are not mine. The armour is rusted, as if it has been used hundreds of times before in the midst of a hurricane. The helmet is too large, the chain mail has holes in it, and the plate legs do not fit at all. This is not my armour. My armour bears a pleasing pattern of black and red stripes. This armour bears a similar black, but in lieu of the red a disgusting mustard yellow is present. It is not my armour.
In front of me, I see a shield, but it is not my shield. It is a flimsy little thing, composed of almost pure iron. When I carry my shield, I feel a strong sense of security, but this is not my shield. When I hold this shield in front of me, I feel as though my life is in danger at every moment. Looking at the holes in the shield where spears have pierced through only worries me further. This is not my shield. Upon this shield is a foreign insignia, one worn by my enemies, one that reminds me that I am surrounded by individuals who wish to see me dead. This is not my shield.
And yet, with these three gifts, I am expected to march towards my former home. I am expected to slay my friends with this sword, protect myself from their just vengence with this armour, and pile their bodies upon this shield. All to serve my mortal enemy and thus save my own life. This is truly work for the lowest maggots of the earth. Yet, if I decline to perform these deeds, not only will I perish, but so too will those who I once called friends. To save us all, Bellij must fall, and for Bellij to fall, I must live yet.

Sing a Little

"You called, Supreme Commander?"
"Yes, s3c0ndh4nd. I would just like to inform you that we will be attacking the temple soon. I’m not sure exactly when would be a wise time to strike. Would you happen to have any idea when the best time would be?"
This was a test. Bellij was already well informed of the answer, and should s3c0ndh4nd answer falsely, Bellij would know that s3c0ndh4nd was disloyal to him, and could have him killed.
"Typically security lightens up around the end of May, Supreme Commander."
Bellij growled. s3c0ndh4nd had passed the test.
s3c0ndh4nd bowed, and took his leave. Bellij now had much to consider. How would he go about attacking the Union this time around? How much time would he have before his enemies would strike against s3c0ndh4nd, their former leader? And (he cringed when he thought of this) where exactly was Kakunaman? Up until recently, Bellij had been certain that Kakunaman still resided within the temple. Kakunaman was never one to behave as expected, however, and he could just as easily be on the other end of the world. This was problematic. Kakunaman was the one person capable of stopping him, and if his army happened to be ambushed by a group led by Kakunaman, thousands of his own would die before they could raise a sword in self defense. Once he found out that s3c0ndh4nd was in his possession, he would surely retreat back to the temple from wherever he was, but what then? Would he launch a full scale attack, or take matters into his own hands? Or would he wait for him to make the first move?
"What a pest," muttered Bellij to himself.


I dreamed I met a foreigner:
A most amazing child.
He had a certain look about him, one that is so rarely found in people of his age. It was a sort of… charisma, and yet he appeared entirely unaware that he possessed this quality.
I followed him, and asked him what his name was.
"Mario," he replied.
Mario had chestnut hair and eyes to match. His hair was of moderate length, and in a style I had never seen before.
I befriended Mario, and we became the closest of friends. He led me on what I suppose would be considered a "righteous" path in life. I was captivated by him, he seemed to hold the answers to everything. He was younger, and yet I considered him my leader.
Then I met one of my old friends, and she tried to take me away from Mario and lead me down another path. Light or dark, I never found out. I flatly refused to accompany her, saying that I was happy where I was. After repeated attempts to get me to leave Mario, she left me. That was the last that I saw of any of my old friends.
Mario accepted me in a way no one else ever has.
Yet… I woke up, and he was gone.
And I felt such pain at losing him.