It feels like I’m about to cross a line in the sand.

Tomorrow I start articling. In theory, this is just the beginning of another job, but it feels like so much more.

Today I’m still a student. Tomorrow I’m not. It’s the end of an era – the only era I’ve ever known, really.

As a student I had flexibility. There were obligations, but how I chose to meet those obligations was almost entirely up to me. I was, in effect, my own boss. I could choose to take a day off every now and then if I needed a breather. I could choose to take the entire first week of a term off to, say, go to Wales.

Tomorrow I have a boss again. That means I can’t even take an afternoon off without permission.

And yeah, I get that that’s how a job works. You get paid to do what someone else tells you to do. I’ve had jobs before, and I’ve had bosses before.

The difference is that this time it’s forever. Every previous job I’ve had finished by the end of August because it was time to go back to school. That’s not the case this time. When September rolls around, I’ll still be working. The same will be true of next September, and the September after that. There are no more summers off to look forward to.

It’s a big line to cross, and I can’t help but feel that I’m not quite ready to make the leap yet.

Advertisements