This isn’t easy.

My job demands that I stay in a law office all day and use most of my energy thinking about various legal problems. Now, I can deal with that. Sure, the hours are longer than they’re supposed to be. And sure, that means that anyone who I might want to talk to in GMT is likely to be either asleep or semi-comatose by the time I get home. But I can deal with that because the work itself is generally meaningful and satisfying, and it’s only a 12 week commitment that I’ve made.

What I’m having trouble dealing with is what comes after work.

After spending 8 or 9 or 10 hours in a law office, thinking about law, the last thing I want to do is come home and think about law and law offices for another four hours. But that’s what I’ve had to do for the last two weeks. I wake up, I go to work, I come home, I work on applications for a few hours, and I go to sleep. If I take a break for any length of time, it means falling behind.

I’m exhausted, I really am. And I can’t even console myself with the thought that everyone else in my class is in the same boat, because most aren’t. Most of the people who are applying for jobs right now are doing so because they didn’t get a job for this summer. Unlike me, they’re not limited to working on applications for 4 hours per day after a 10 hour shift. That puts me at a big disadvantage.

The good news is that this is temporary. Applications are due on July 3rd whether I finish them or not. 13 more days of this until I can rest, at least a little.

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