It’s about 2:30 AM local time here in Toronto, and due to the monsoon presently occurring outside, I can’t sleep. I figured I’d come online and mash some words into my keyboard for a bit in the hopes that I might bore myself into unconsciousness.

But uh… I don’t really have anything to write about at the moment. Give me a sec.

***

Okay, I’ve got it.

In just ten days I’ll be embarking on a journey to Oxford for my second attempt at school away from home. And we all remember how the first attempt went.

There are a few key differences between the last time and this time, however. The first, and most important difference is the time I’ll be away. Whereas my adventure to Queen’s was scheduled to last four years, this one will only last for the duration of August. The other key difference is the distance I’ll be from home. Kingston put me a mere 250 kilometres from home, but this time I’ll be venturing across the Atlantic, over 5,000 kilometres away.

Just to be clear, I’m not nervous about this at all or anything. In fact, I wouldn’t even be making the comparison to Queen’s if it wasn’t so late at night.

I think it’ll be a good test for me though. Even though a month isn’t really that long, bear in mind that it’ll be longer than I’ve ever spent away from my family before. Queen’s proved too difficult for me to handle, but the reality is that I was never away from home for more than three weeks at a time. My time at Queen’s left me with doubts as to whether or not I’m the type of person who can survive without his family being nearby, and in the two years since I left, I’ve done  nothing to resolve those doubts. By no means will a month away from home leave me feeling confident about my ability to leave Woodbridge behind someday, but hey. Baby steps, right?

It’s true that it only took Queen’s about four weeks to get me to start filling out the transfer forms, but that figure is a bit misleading. It wasn’t the first month at Queen’s that made me leave. It wasn’t even the first year. It was the prospect of having to face three more years after the first one. That’s what broke my spirits. Had Queen’s been a one year program right from the start, I think I would have been fine. I might have even enjoyed it. I don’t have any evidence to back that claim up. It’s just a gut feeling. And that same gut feeling is telling me that Oxford is nothing to be worried about at all.

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