When you’re speaking to someone to whom you speak just about every day, and you say “Hey! How have you been since last we spoke?”, you usually get a pretty detailed answer. They might tell you about what they ate for breakfast, or what they watched on TV, or about what a satisfying shit they had earlier in the day. Stuff like that.

When you haven’t spoken to someone for a year and you ask them the same question, you tend to get something vague like “Not too bad.”

It’s not necessarily a problem that this happens. It’s unfortunate, but it’s just how life works. I mean, you can’t answer that question the same way when the time period in question is a year rather than a day. You can’t possibly get into that kind of detail about every shit you’ve taken over the past twelve months. It’s highly impractical.

People do move between the two types of relationships. What’s unfortunate is that the process is somewhat one-sided. It’s much easier to lose touch with someone than it is to rebuild a strong relationship with someone who you’ve lost touch with.

I think the key is to avoid losing touch in the first place. It’s inevitable that you’re going to lose touch with some people. There are too many great people in the world to keep track of them all. Inevitably Fate steps in and tries to tear you away from certain people in your life. But sometimes I think that you’ve just got to make an effort to hold on to people. To avoid losing touch, you’ve got to put some effort in. You’ve got to fight Fate.

I guess what I’m trying to say is that you’ll do less damage to a relationship by asking someone about how their most recent shit was than by not asking them.

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