In general, I love anniversaries, with the notable exception of birthdays.

Anniversaries celebrate the amount of time since something happened, or the amount of time that something has been happening for. That strikes me as a very positive thing, unless the event in question is a tragedy.

But yesterday was a joyous anniversary, marking four years of the existence of this space.

And I’m proud of that. Really, I am.

Not because anything I’ve written here is particularily good, or because my life is more interesting than anyone else’s, but because I’ve been honest here.

True, I haven’t put up every minute detail about my life here. Plenty has happened over the past four years that I’ve opted not to post. But this is the Internet, and there’s a thin line between bravery and stupidity, and I feel that putting your whole life up on a wall crosses that line, especially since anyone could potentially see this space with two well-placed left clicks. Not that such a thing is likely to happen. But it’s happened once, maybe twice, and could happen again. So for that reason, I keep certain things off of here.

But when I’ve spoken, I’ve been honest. I’ve told the world (i.e. three people) how I feel about particular issues, and what I think about the events in my day-to-day life. I’ve told you what’s important to me, what makes me smile, what makes my angry, what scares me to death, what makes me sad, and what I don’t really give a shit about. I’ve written about some good times and some bad times, but mostly good times. And I’ve written about my friends, the fantastic people who I’ve shared some good times and some bad times with, but mostly good times.

And I’ve been honest. Which is a little strange, because it would be so easy to lie on here.

I mean, how do you tell if someone’s lying? Their body language, stalling a few seconds before replying, maybe a little bit of stuttering in the voice, that sort of thing. Even on MSN you can sort of tell whether or not someone is lying by asking them a bunch of questions and seeing how they respond. You can’t do that to me here. It’s just text, so you can’t tell if I’m laughing maniacally while typing this. I’m not very likely to stutter, either. And you can’t question me directly (unless you hound me on MSN later on) since all you have the power to do is reply with a few sentences in the comment box below, which I’ll always read but usually won’t respond to.

But I don’t think that I’ve told a single lie on here in all of four years. That’s incredible.

And I’ve been around for all four of those years, too. I haven’t taken a single hiatus. I think that there was one twenty day gap between blogs because I couldn’t think of anything to write, and a couple of two week gaps due to vacations and a lack of ideas in the period immediately thereafter. But I’ve never written less than three blogs in a month, and I’ve never gone more than two days without checking to see if someone has left me a comment (except for those instances where I’ve been out of town).

I think that the main reason that I’ve been so honest and so active when posting here is becauseĀ I want to have a record of Who I Once Was for myself in the future. That can’t happen if a) I don’t post, or b) I don’t tell the truth.

But with that said, I don’t know if I would continue writing here if no one read these blogs. Having a record of Who I Once Was will be great, of course, but I need some immediate gratification as well, and that comes in the form of people commenting on these blogs. Seriously, it’s one of the best moments of my day when I go to check my space and I see the message "______ commented on Michael Danese’s (that’s pronounced Dah-neh-zeh. "Dah-nay-zay" was actually closer than "Dan-eese", thank you very much.) blog post __________." I talk about myself a lot, but I try to write in such a way that my dull life seems at least somewhat entertaining, and when someone comments it makes me feel like I’m succeeding in that. Either that, or all of my friends live equally dull lives and have nothing better to do than read about my dull life.

So, that’s four down. And really, I’m not all that far from where I started. Four years ago, it was summer ’05, and I was a nervous kid going into high school without much idea of what I was doing. Today, it’s summer ’09, and I’m a nervous kid going into university without much idea of what I’m doing.

The main difference is that I’m a little bit smarter this time around. In no small part due to this blog, I know where I messed up in high school, and I know what I did very well in high school. I can only hope that I correct my mistakes and duplicate my successes this time around.

Four years from now, I’ll be done with my undergraduate program. I don’t know what I’ll be doing after that. Law school, probably, but I don’t know for sure. It’s all a great mystery, and one which I’ll slowly piece together on this blog while you all read and give me your thoughts.

And I wouldn’t have it any other way.

Four years down, countless more to go.

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