Hola fucknutteries, this isn’t a full rant, but it’s something that shows how spectacular I am.
Way back a few years ago, this show "Zoey 101" showed up on my T.V., and you know what I said?
I said "Holy fuck, this is the single n00biest show in the history of the world. Every actress in it is a n00b, and 95% of the the actors are too. Anyone who watches this show will be able to feel their mind slowly fucking dissolving. I can’t watch this shit."
And I made it my duty to watch other great Family channel shows (The Weekenders, The Suite Life of Zack and Cody, Ned’s Declassified School Survival Guide, among others) and not waste my time with such bullturd.
See, there are a few factors that make such a show shrubish:
1. It’s so feminist that it causes the souls of viewers to die. Feminism can be tolerable in small doses (see The Proud Family) but Z101 lays in on way too thick. The dude characters are complete retards, and the chicks are feminist fools. At least make the gender of your intended audience subtle…
2. PCA (the school the characters attend) is an all guys school turned into a co-ed school. Everyone knows that if you do that to a school, your nublet levels increase 267%. How did I come to that statistic? I made it up. Where did I get that line? I stole it. Fuck off. Levels of n00byness that high concentrated in one place is the cause of global warming and the War in Iraq.
3. It’s incredibly unrealistic, which isn’t a bad thing by itself. Some of the greatest shows on the planet are unrealistic. What’s the difference between these and Z101? They don’t TRY to be realistic. Look at Pokemon. Awesome fucking show, but no kids actually go around trying to capture Suicune (Although, if I saw a kid doing that I’d tip my hat to him, but that’s just me). Zoey 101 is a show that girly kiddies will watch, and think that middle school is actually like that. It really isn’t. Girls aren’t better at absolutely everything, as that show would have you believe. It’s all lies and propaganda spread to you by Nickelodeon, trying to make you a fucking feminist, which relates back to point one of this whole thing.
And see, two years later, I’m right! Aren’t I always? To put this kindly, ‘ol Jamie n00blynn Spears was fucked by a penis in her vagina, had semen from said penis put into her uterus, and a sperm cell fertilized an ovum, and now there’s another Spears kiddo on the way. 16 years old, this kid is. Exactly one day older than that Melissa fuckslutfagqueerzorgblahwhoremunch who tends to read these things, FYI.
…And you were worried about global warming before! Fuck, you kiddies ain’t seen nothin yet. 
There you have it mates. Spears is a whore. So is your mother. Just remember one thing for me: Real men eat rice bread.